Lame Is Not Cool

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You’ve probably seen these classic youth archetypes played out on TV and movies: there’s the hopeful kid who wants to fit in, but he’s always put in his place by the child curmudgeon whose opinion about most everything is that it, whatever it is, totally sucks. Our protagonist feels obligated to jump on board denouncing everything so that the negative kid who, with his unending dissatisfaction with the world, will think that he is cool.

I’ve thought about this situation a lot over the years, and wondered why for some people, the default opinion seems to always be “that is lame”. If we’re analyzing teenagers, then we can come up with a simple answer: it’s a defense mechanism. A preemptive strike against liking something might change others’ opinions about him. He wants to seem cool, aloof, and hard to please, ergo everything sucks.

Since I recently moved, I’m meeting and working with new people, and on a few occasions recently, some people have tried to unload their negative feelings about our surroundings onto me. It felt as if I, as the new guy, needed to be informed about all this negative crap before I had the chance to develop my own opinion. My opinion was actually quite positive, but I still started to question how I felt. At first, I felt that same obligation to agree—not to have the same opinion necessarily, but to at least be sympathetic to the fact that someone else was unhappy. After listening to quite a lot of what I now consider to be outright whining, however, I decided that no, I don’t agree, and if I don’t feel the same way, I shouldn’t feed into it.

I took some distance from this situation and thought about what motivates people to project their negative opinions onto others. I can understand sharing positive feelings; it’s always nice to make other people feel good. But why would anyone want other people to feel badly? It’s the same simple answer: negativity is a defense mechanism.

If someone doesn’t like his job, for example, but doesn’t feel secure enough to change his situation, it might make him feel better to get other people on his side, agreeing with him about how terrible this and that is, or how unreasonable the boss is being. Does anything change? Probably not—in fact, it probably will get worse because all of this guy’s energy is focusing on everything that’s wrong. The real problem is that he is choosing to stay in an unsatisfactory situation.

Then there are some people who seem to dislike everything. Buildings are ugly, TV is crass, movies are boring, restaurants are tacky, and they can’t stand most everyone. We all have preferences and tastes, of course, but I’m sure you’ve all met one of these impossible to please types. I think it’s the same defense mechanism playing out in a different way: these people are so insecure that instead of just avoiding things they dislike, they need to make everything seem beneath them, as if the world should work harder to meet their standards. Maybe they think this makes them seem more refined. Maybe they do genuinely hate everything. But they sure aren’t fun to be around.

What surprises me is that even though some behaviors carry into adulthood, we sometimes stop looking at them in simple terms. Maybe it’s because life stops happening to us and we have to take responsibility, so to simply label a behavior as a defense mechanism feels unfair. After all, by the time we’re adults we have a long list of reasons why we are the way we are: these people made fun of us, we had our hearts broken, we’ve been terribly disappointed and disillusioned, and probably are still recovering from some emotional devastation. So of course it’s not that simple!

But maybe it is that simple, and maybe the answer is even simpler: just do your best to stop being arbitrarily negative. Unless you walk around feeling sparkly and refreshed after a long bitchfest, just don’t do it! There is a difference between having a serious objection to something and just whining about it, and of course there are times when something comes up that needs to be addressed—meaning that it requires action, not talk. These days I try very hard to stop and ask myself why I feel the way I do when I’m compelled to say something negative, and usually I come up with a better answer than, “because this is lame.” But if that’s really the only answer I think of, then I try to just shut it out.

Amazingly, it takes a lot of conscious effort at first to point out the things you feel good about in the world. It seems so counterintuitive, but it just takes a bit of reprogramming to reroute all of that energy spent whining into words of positivity. And it’s worth the effort; as anyone who remembers high school can affirm, we have a profound effect on each other and how we perceive the world. Lets take advantage of the powers of peer pressure to make being positive cool!

Back to Basics

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I know now, more than ever, it is time for all of us to get back to basics. I
know it on a personal level, which is how we learn, but I know, too, that many
clients who have been calling for readings are expressing this same thing. A feeling of being lost. I am hearing it from friends, family, and neighbors. The feeling of being “lost” is a common one we fall into when Life seems out of control and no matter how fast we peddle we simply can’t keep up or feel equal to those around us. Forgotten is probably a better word than lost but you get
the picture. It is a sad and frightening place to dwell. I believe three quarters
of the people reading this now are agreeing and saying, “me too.”  These past
few months have dealt me some good punches and that is when I figured out
what was wrong. It is not the Earth vibration; it is not Mars, Venus, Saturn being retrograde. It is not that God has forsaken us. It is us. That is all, it is us. We have become so overloaded with Spiritual concepts and preachings and books and tapes and CDs that Life has become a complicated place to be and a difficult place to thrive. We are drenched in what the TV news is spilling out and the
radio and the phones and all the information is polluting our thoughts. So we are going back to the basics here. I ask in advance from any of you who make take this as condescending for forgiveness. I assure you it is not. Had I not spoken to myself like a third grader these past few weeks, I do not think I could have obtained the old information that got bogged down and crowded and buried.

So here it is.

The material plane works because opposites attract. The Tide and the Moon, Male and Female, Night and Day, The push/pull of the magnetic poles, Gravity. All of these things serve to keep the planets in the sky and in their orbits. On an Earthly level, that is simply how things operate down here. It’s the Spirit Plane that is different. (Did I hear a big collective “Whew”?) Here is the important part. On the Spirit Level Like attracts Like. Take a minute with that. Our mothers all told us at one time or another to be “careful what you pray for” and the punch line is, as we all know, “you may get it” This needs to be taken back to the wisdom that it truly is. There is nothing funny about it at all. The key word of that old adage is careful.  Choose the words with Care and attention to what it is you are asking. An old Master once asked me why I was praying for $400. I told him because my refrigerator had finally died and I needed a new one. The children were babies at that time and I had food in an old cooler and in plastic bags tied with rope and hanging out an upstairs window. (winter time) So again he asked why I was asking for $400. I told him that was the cost of a new appliance. He said, “You need a fridge, pray for a fridge. A neighbor may move and offer you their old one as to not take on the
expense of moving it. Some one could redecorate and not want their red one anymore. Many options will open if you pray for what you want, not what your limited mind thinks it takes to get what you want. By praying for money you are closing the gates to all other options.” I’ve never forgotten that lesson. It’s been proven to me time and again over the years.

Now, keeping these two basics,
Like attracts Like and be Careful, let’s move on. Understand this, Human Energy
shifts and changes all the time. Everything  you think, everything you say,
everything you do surrounds you with a force field of energy. This energy
presents in a color but it is not the Aura. It’s the Human stuff. We all have
it. Imagine that you are very angry and see that you have surrounded yourself
with a red glow. (seeing red, livid, hot) Now this red will not stay in place
because you will more than likely not stay angry. This energy of the Human is
your Creative force. Let’s assume you are currently surrounded in a brilliant
green color.The intensity of the color speaks of time, air time mentally, that
you have given a particular thought. (Never forget, Thoughts ARE actions) An
intense green tells me that you are applying for change in your Life. Good
change. Growth, Laughter, Beauty, Health, Renewal, Prosperity, Rebirth. Green is
the color of Spring. You are growing and bringing to yourself things of this new
growth. This is the energy the Universe responds to. It’s Like attracting Like.
It’s the change part that trips us up. I often tell clients in this Green energy
to picture themselves at an intersection. They are standing on the curb waiting
for the light to change so they may go forward into the future. Why the light?
Why the wait? Because there are some things you need to leave on the curb.
Remember this: That which does not serve you, may not come with you into the
future. If you keep the stuff that brings you down you will stay on the curb. Time
will pass but it won’t bring you to the future for which you prayed and worked .
You’ll just sit on the curb and in old age will say “What happened, I didn’t get
to do many of the things I wanted to” That’s because your suitcases were too
many. Too burdensome.It’s up to us to clean up the baggage. Some baggage is
easier to leave on the curb than other baggage. The Holy Man of Tibet told us
that our mission here is to be Happy. How easy is that? Why is so hard to
achieve? Baggage.

Baggage, simply put, is the inability to change our minds. We
dwell on the old patterns in our minds. Baggage is the thought process. We refuse
to let go of the old way of thinking of ourselves, others, events, memories. We
get more suitcases to hold it all. Now that you have looked and thought about and
dumped and repacked and lightened the load you are ready to journey
forward. Because you have sent out this Green energy, this wanting for growth and
happiness, the Universe is responding. The Universe MUST respond. Like attracts
Like. If you spend time and thought on the people or the things or the habits
that you would leave behind well then, you’re not leaving them are you? (Careful
thought) Once that great relief has occurred get out of the way! It is NOT the
relief of the drug habit being kicked, or the booze being put down or the nail
biting stopped or the people who drag you down on an emotional level being put
aside or the inability to love yourself, it is the relief of Knowing that you
have exercised Free Will and have changed your mind. Did you get that? Changed
your mind.

It is within the Mind that Creation begins for you.You may feel you
went to great lengths to change this and get rid of that but the wonderful truth
is that you changed your Mind and the Universe responded. I knew a woman who was
in a terrible relationship. (Bless her heart, I use her example a lot.) She
would cry night and day to anyone who would listen that she “had to get out of
here!” I would ask her about where she would like to be. She didn’t care, she
just prayed to get out of there. (No one blamed her. Her husband was abusive to
her and the children. They lived in poverty and he went to the bar every night)
Well after years of asking to get out of there, she wound up homeless. Then she
cried “Why did God do this to me?”The truth is she did it. (God is Love. All
Good things come from God. If it wasn’t Good, it didn’t come from God)The
Universe/God/Spirit gave her exactly what she prayed for. The reason it took so
long was that she wasn’t willing to make the change. (the old “Devil you know”
thing.) But when she was truly in synch with her thoughts it all happened for
her.

Here’s an Understanding. The Universe does not bother with the subtle nature
of language. It receives the core of the image. This is why diseases are more
local to some areas than others. There is always a great banging of the drums
for fund raisers, and research. And a great number of people in that area are
affected with the disease. It’s simply because they give it so much air time
mentally. This is tricky. The Universe doesn’t get the “I don’t wants” and the
“wants” as separate messages. I receives the images and gives what your thoughts
are on. It this case a disease. Do you get this? It’s really important. The
Native Americans warn us of “Rabbit Power”. This is another twist where
thoughts, seemingly protecting us, backfire.

There is a charming story about a rabbit and a hawk being good friends.

The hawk would bring all good things to the rabbit and the rabbit was always happy

to see his friend. Then one day the
rabbit saw the hawk eat a mouse. Oh heavens the rabbit became afraid of the hawk
and thought about him all day. He wondered if that shadow was the hawk, that
noise. Oh my. One day the Hawk caught him unawares and asked where he had been.
The hawk told the rabbit he was afraid he was being ignored by the rabbit and
they had been such good friends. So the rabbit told him about seeing him eat a
mouse and he was afraid the hawk would eat him, too. The hawk assured the mouse
that he would never hurt his friend. But the rabbit could not change the way he
thought about the hawk. In time the hawk forgot about the rabbit. But the rabbit
always thought of the danger of the hawk and one day the hawk swooped down and
ate him.Poor rabbit. He could not take the one frightening thought about the
hawk away from his mind. With all the good the hawk had done for him, all the
fun they shared, the negative was the powerful thought. It’s the thought that
was heeded. Poor Rabbit. Couldn’t change his mind.

I advise all the time to monitor thoughts. Every thought of the day has a power and

 an impact on our
Lives. It’s true whether you believe it or not. We are Human. We fail. (some
more often that others and this is not a judgment it is a fact. Some are less
willing to let go of the patterns from which they are praying to be released)You
will goof once in a while with thoughts. The trick is to monitor the thoughts at
all times. Like when you’re on a diet. You are careful and attentive of what you
take in. You goof and have ice cream. Get back on the horse. You drink more water
the next day or exercise a bit more and go light on what you take in for a day or
two. Why? Because you are trying to cancel the effects of the ice cream on the
body. Likewise, you can also cancel the crap when it enters your thoughts.
Cancel the effects they have on our Spirits and our Lives. It’s easy. Just out
loud or to yourself say…. “Wow, that was a mean spirited, nasty, negative
(submit your own adjective) thought” and continue, “I cancel that”. Then as the
masters have taught us,Change Your Mind! Think about something pleasant and then
go back a little while later and try to think of what it was you cancelled and
I’ll be impressed if you can bring it to mind without some serious
thinking.

There’s the basics. Be careful with your thoughts. Think no harm to
another human. Know the Universe will give you what you are asking for and be
ready to leave the curb and cross the street into your future.(Know your
thoughts, they are being answered)Remember to clean the “wrong” thoughts every
time you catch them. Take inventory at night. Remember the day and the words and
the thoughts and the worries for the purpose of canceling them.These are the
basics and they are simple. Our minds, thoughts, spirits give out an energy in
the form of a force field that is always answered. Everything we think, say and
do generates that energy. Repeat that sentence.The elder I studied with told me
of two wolves that lived within him. One was very peaceful, loving and generous.
The other was always sullen and angry and very aggressive and mean.“But only one
of them can live”, he said

“Which one will live”, I asked.

“The one I feed” said the Chief.

Please feed the love. Every minute. Keep an eye to the future asYou
create it in this moment. Like attracts Like. If you give out, even in thought,
the energy of jealousy, fear and doubt that is what will be given. It is not a
trick, it is Universal Law.

 Blessings abound, my dear ones. There is no limit to
who you are. In Light, Charlotte I would love to hear from anyone interested in
a reading to take this further in his or her personal lives. I can be reached at SageDelaney@aol.com